This week has been hard but have realized I have some pretty amazing friends both new and old. I am trying to lose weight get healthy and strong the right way this time. Not by restricting calories or trying to workout to end the day with a negative number on Myfitness Pal. Its a struggle one I usually survive for a few days and then quit. Or end up on the cycle of skipped meals for days/weeks.
For the last two weeks I have been using the app and logging my food. I haven't done much in the workout area but I am ok with that I think that I need to get food under good control and be ok with eating 1200 calories a day and adding in cardio and strength little at a time. I have also switched up what I have been eating trading out empty nutritional value high calorie foods (that I would eat just to get some calories in toward my 1200 goal) for foods that are good for me and for my body. I had gave up soda for 11 days and then caved and had one.
Monday was super stressful at work and when I get stressed one of two things happens. I either skip meals or I have a fountain dr. pepper. With the encouragement of two amazing friends I ate my meals and stayed away from soda. However we had a training meeting at the fire dept that night and I sent out a text to a friend that if they got themselves a soda for the meeting would they please bring me one. It didn't taste that good but it was an odd relief and I got thru the meeting without strangling anyone.. I think that if I hadn't had that soda there would have been one person who would have got a nice piece of my mind.
Tuesday I woke up expecting to crave a soda and well I didn't so I decided that soda would be ok for special treats like dinners out or auctions in the summer. However Tuesday at work was WAY more stressful than Monday was. But I refrained from falling to the soda or skipping meals. Once again thanks to a friend that was very helpful in keeping me from going off deep end. I haven't known her very long but she is amazing and I am SO glad our paths crossed! Tuesday night didn't sleep had bad dreams and one bad dream that I hadn't had in over 14 years that kept me awake for 2 hours.
Wednesday was a little better than Tuesday but not much I did end up not eating enough at breakfast so for lunch I had some chicken strips and a soda. And all was right in the world my brain was functiniong from having the protein of the chicken and being full and the soda took the edge off the stress. My friend texted me and said it was ok to have a soda cause once in a while we need our blankie. SO SO true. The evening was good kids were pretty well behaved and played together nicely (been a struggle for the last couple weeks). My best friend sent me a text with a treadmill challenge that was 10 min long and I did it well I had to modify a bit but it was done and I pushed hard and I had done 10 minutes of legs and ab/core work.
Ended up having a ambulance assist fire call a little after 10 so I went to it got home around 11 and went to bed. No bad dreams but still dreams that caused little to no sleep.
This morning I woke up yes tired but not as stressed feeling which I am glad of and so far the day has been way better than the whole week.
Maybe I am finally figuring this all out and I can't even to begin how nice it is to have a support system of great friends and online friends like Mindy from Road Runner Girl! Who told me I was awesome yesterday which was something I needed to hear. I often feel alone in this journey but I realized yesterday I am not alone. I have a lot of people who believe in me even when I don't believe in myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment